Flame On!I’m a little on the overwhelmed side right now, but I realize that I have blogbligations and must post some new content for my Dear, Faithful Reader(s).

Hence this wee nugget of sublime scariness that I first jotted down in the middle of December but am revisiting only now.  Behold! To your right witness “Flame™ Body Spray.” Produced for Burger King®, it is the dubiously inspired essence of greasy grilled goodness in atomized form.

The WHOPPER® sandwich is America’s Favorite burger. FLAME™ by BK® captures the essence of that love and gives it to you. Behold the scent of seduction, with a hint of flame-broiled meat.

You may think this is a joke. You may look at your calendar and wonder if it’s too early for April 1st. You may think these things even more strongly if you click the link and experience the pseudo-Barry White soundtrack of severely bridled lust. But no, it exists; there is apparently significant demand for this item, as the on-line distributor says it’s backordered. The cynics among you will claim this fact as proof of its hoaxiness, but, rest assured, you share the planet with numerous vials of this, this … objet.

Flame™ Body Spray Whopper® Sandwich

Calories

0 680

Net wt.

0.17oz (many “servings”) 290g per serving

Price

$3.99 $2.99 (estimated)

Price per oz.

$23.47 $0.29
Source: Official Burger King websites

What, pray tell, is next? Is this a legitimate trend? Will it go upmarket? Shall we brace ourselves for such unsavory concoctions as:

  • Eau de Emeril?
  • Bobby Flay (or Rachael Ray) Spray?
  • Essence du Bordain?
  • Profumi di Batali?